mattWear - Mustachio'd Man 2

Inspired by my recent gift of freezer paper, i decided to attempt another shirt. "ahh but what subject," i pondered as i stroked my thickening mustache...

mattWear - Mustachio'd Man Shirt

Got a bit more comfortable with the idea of cutting out stencils... unfortunately, shortly after snapping this pickture and letting it dry, it appears most of the paint has soaked into the shirt, leaving a "suble" "washed out" image on the front of my breast. alas.. i still like the design though..

experimental patience

Apparently my initial guess was correct and my patience got in the way.  After a long ass period of time, the tea did begin to seep and now I have a tea colored, cold beverage.

Cheers.

I’m the best scientist ever

Experiment of the day.

No time to go buy hot water downstairs so I just threw a teabag in my
cup of cold water assuming that temperature can't be that important in
seeping tea. Maybe hotter=faster, but its gotta work no matter what the
temperature, right?
Well. So far no. so now I have a cold glass of water with a tea bag in
it. I should have been a little scientist when I grew up.

It's Too Early to Share

It is officially 8:13 in the morning, a good ten minutes into my day and
i am currently suffering through a harrowing tale of bowel torment from
the lady in the cube across from me. There are certain key phrases that
help you to realize that no, you do not want to be regaled with any part
of the narrative. The line that did it for me just minutes ago:
"Yeah, i popped four Immodium and it didn't do squat."
Dear cube lady: This is not a business appropriate conversation.
Addendum: as i finish writing this, she has begun telling the story to
a second coworker (from the beginning).
Additional bonus line:
"Yeah, i'm still running, but it's not nearly that bad"
[m shakes fist angrily at monday]

MattWear 1 - TreeShirt

So, braincube got into making his own t-shirts a bit ago and they came out supercool (i'll try and find a picture of his "brownie" shirt to post here). This inspired me.
Then i received a goonballin' t-shirt from raynbo's girl that i wear whenever i can..
Finally, it became time for me to attempt it. Lacking a screen printing device and much experience myself, my first attempt didn't come out as nice as either of theirs.. but, fuck it dude. i like it.
Here is my TreeShirt

The Metamorphosis

If only because i'm posting some of my other stuff, i'll post this one. i was really happy with how it came out and god knows where it currently resides. You see, as i was sending the provisionals the images below, i played with the envelope and this was the image that was attached to that sexy 8x11" envelope.

Buy This CD -- The Provisionals: Digital Lady

So, if i haven't already attacked you with all of my retail prowess, here is a post to tell you about The Provisionals' second (and best) CD: Digital Lady. It really is quite excellent and you should buy it. You can get it on iTunes, but i suggest you buy it through cdBaby so that you can get all the artwork i did for it. Yes, all that beauty you see (or will see when you buy it) was created by me at the request of those very talented California musicians (who i must say, have great taste.)
As i pleaded earlier, buy a copy for yourself, your significant other, your friends, your family and your enemies (think of it as the beginning of your reconciliation.)
You can listen to most of it on either their myspace account or at the cdBaby site.
As a special "gift" for those of you viewing it through here.. here are the originals that were used/cropped/written over by those musical sex gods, The Provisionals' for their second CD: Digital Lady. (If, after listening to this indie masterpiece, you have the desire to sleep with one or all of the band members, let me know, I have an in.)

PS: from their CDbaby site (before they change it..) here is a short description of hte album:

Arguably the worst band around - this barely meets the definition of music.

From New York and California, the members of The Provisionals created a velvetine lounge, turned up their amps and mixed bitter-tart melodies with harmonies, practically in tune. They then brought in sordid, checkered rhythms, and continued to drink Assam tea. Unfettered by tiny earholes, The Provisionals listen to The Walkmen, Elliott Smith, The Flaming Lips, The Zombies, and occasionally each other.

Front


Back


Inside (Behind CD)


Inside Cover


Liner Notes Background (foldout)

Altruism Part 1

So we'll forget about the recent pieces i've given to nishat and call this the first Altruism Work. I'm not totally disappointed by it, but there are a lot of elements i am a bit unhappy with (makes me want to paint something else and not screw up).. anyway.. congratulations kimmie.. enjoy it and get it framed (i'll keep better).

Really should have lightened up that background before i went any further. also, learned an lesson on the importance of sketching and not just saying "I'll figure it out later"


Notice the pinky gets another cm in length by the next picture.


Needed more movement... thus the leeches in the background.. they weren't going to be leeches but apparently that's what the brush wanted


It GLOWS

The finished product.
Don't let this one scare you off, i can paint better than this and just found a box with a full set of cheap acrylics. That being said, first one to comment or email gets the second altruistic work. (I took today off, so it could be done quickly... in theory)

Candidate Songs: Barack Obama

So, i got a little email from Jonah today, announcing how he had written a song for Barack Obama. It's super catchy and he is only charging $20.08 for the MP3 (all donations going to Obama's campaign) and i was inspired! I'll write a song for each of the candidates and only charge $19 a piece.

Well, if i record them.

So.. anyway, here is the first song. it's about a candidate that i am personally supporting (assuming Gravell doesn't get the nomination). Enjoy it.

Obamania

Rhythm (in 6/8)
(note, html reads multiple spaces as a single space... so you cannot see where the chords should go.. well it's easy.. for the C# lines, the last three syllables get the chords)
A(on 1) G(on 4)
1+ + + 4+ + +
C(on 1) D(on 4)
1+ + + 4+ + +

A(on 1)
1+ + + 4+ + +
C#(on 1) G#(on 4) A(on 5+) B(on 6+)
1+ + + 4+ + +

A G
C D

A G
C D

A
In 96 he made his debut
C# G# A B
this guy cares about the issues
A
oh, you know it is so true
C# G# A B
and he's a master of kung-fu

A
If you don't vote for Barack
C# G# A B
You are casting your vote for a Cock
A
be a man, Don't vote with the flock
C# G# A B
he'll clear the streets of all the glocks


A
go ahead and ask your momma
C# G# A B
she'll tell you to vote for obama
A
he gives her a ideological bone-ah
C# G# A B
he plans to help all the social strata

A G
C D

A G
C D

A
you know he asks you to believe
C# G#A B
the middle class deserves a reprieve
A
unlike clinton, he won't deceive
C# G# A B
our economic woes will be allieved

A
he promises to get us out of iraq
C# G# A B
for longterm planning he has a knack
A
lets get this country back on track
C# G# A B
please give us a vote for barack!

(quarter Notes hits)
A
obama
G
mitzvah
C
samba
C#
vodka
D
vulva
{rest}

C# G# A B
All great things, vote for obama

A G
C D

C D

I'm feeling altruistic

so my friends... I'm sitting here drunk again, watching west wing and chumby and I saw one of my most recent paintings I gave to nishst for x-mas... And I thought, shit. I should paint more. So... First one to comment or text me gets a new hand painted paint by the oh so sexy m
ps... I'll pay shipping

halftime penises and football pools

so the giants just won. and my BAC isn't even over .10...
in an attempt to get a respectable level, mau and i attempted a little football pool... a normal grid was created and randomly divided up between the two of us. by quarters, the rules were as follows:
Q1: 1 drink (matt won) (BAC: m:0.05 mau:0.14)
Q2: 2 drinks (mau won) (BAC: m:0.06 mau:0.00)
Q3: 1 drink (mau won) (BAC: m:0.05 mau: 0.03)
Q4: 3 drinks (mau won) (BAC: m:0.08 mau: 0.00)
with a bonus of one drink to the opposing player if the right digit of your BAC equaled the ones digit of either of the teams at the end of the quarter...

Btw.. did anyone notice the giant lit up phallus during the halftime show? or am i just a disturbed little boy

Update: Postgame BAC for m=0.15

World of What?

Let me prefaced this with the statement that i don't judge you. World
of Warcraft is a fine hobby that in no way causes me to judge you,
your physique or your slightly stank breath. I'd go as far to say as
it is quite a bit healthier, physically and socially than drinking on
your couch alone. (Yes! I admit it)

That being said, i am now in about the fourth hour of a series of
conversations around my cube (note: not in it or involving me)
relating to individuals trials and tribulations in a MMORPG that
apparently "[has] the power to make men cry like beaten orphans."* I
now know all about a quest where you are spawned into an area with
thousands of 162s(?) and badass orcs that seem to between you and a
trinket. what does the trinket do? i don't konw.. something about
transporting you back to a village. ("Oh that's all" "Yeah, man. But
you don't understand, it can transport me there from anywhere" "well i
guess you go in and battle a lot more than me, you know a whole bunch
of in and out action"(!)) My point being that my brain is already
dangerously overcrowded. Over the last couple days i've begun to have
a very real concern that i have an inoperable brain tumor that is
preventing me from either learning anything new or focusing on a
though for more than a heartbeat. Please do not shove your azeroth
laden stories into the fragile bit of cheesesponge that i use to
create coherent sentences.

Jesus, SHUT UP already... your stories about hunting yeti skins are
not interesting... not like my winding stories of sitting on a futon
watching tv and drinking... oh wait. shit.

*i do not in anyway endorse the beating of orphans.

Choose your Vacation with Style!

So my last department requires each employee to pick their year's vacation days on January 2nd. If you don't have kids with set vacations or set plans to getaway then you may as well choose your vacation days randomly. Well, mau mentioned this to me so i wrote a little spreadsheet to do just this. I can't post files on this blog for download (i don't think) so if you want it, let me know! (i have it in excel and open office formats (i suggest open office))

Go nerds

so I've decided

I want to be an eccentric... As I watch the the Royal Tanenbaughs (or how ever the fuck it is spelled) I've decided that being an eccentric is the best course of action for a soul like myself.
That is all. Good night y'allr

thing never to do... Part 1

brush your teeth and utilizes a q-tip simultaneously. Ow.

oh yeah, i was sexy

so if you weren't part of the debate, i had a mustache for exactly 5 hours and had a small vote on whether i should keep it.
The end vote was six to one for keeping it. Unfortunatly, i am sleeping with the nay vote.
So, i'm clean shaven now and not nearly as sexy.

i want to make chumbolotl better

So, for those of you that haven't heard, I bought (and received) a brand new "latte" chumby!
If you don't know what a chumby is you can either go to the Chumby Story or just read the next sentence:

The Chumby is a cute always-on internet device that plays flash widgets that provide various useful pieces of information.

Yes, it was a run on sentence, but i realized that i had more than one sentence worth of information. Anyway...
One of the coolest (arguably the coolest) thing about chumby is that it is a completely open platform.

• Anyone can make a widget and upload it for public consumption
• they provide the hardware schematics for any hardware changes you want to make
  • something about a daughterboard
• Besides creating just the widgets the OS is linux based and completely hackable

As you can tell, i am more of a repeater than an understander.
Anyway...
So i have a copy of the Adobe Flash development suite and some free time (not really, but i'll make it) and want to make some shit for my little Chumbolotl...

Any Ideas?

not new year's resolutions

i just wanted to point out that the self-betterment that i am attempting to start (again) is not a result of new year's resolutions. these are simply the DST resolutions that i'm attempting to restart.
so blah.
today i exercised for 45 minutes, only had 2 cigarettes and had a gyro for lunch and 1/4 lbs of turkey for dinner.
Now i am writing something online.
not bad m, not bad.

* as an update, i now have 3 basses in the house and have added a harmonica and an accordion**.

** mau has hidden the accordian

First Time In a Long Time

So, in lieu of getting overly drunk during daylight hours today, i painted a picture.
It's obviously been a while since i've tried to use a brush for anything other than snow removal but i'm not completely disappointed with the results.
Maybe i'll start painting with some consistency again.
or maybe i'll just continue to get drunk during daylight hours.